A young man named Manawee, came to court two sisters (twins). Their father said the young man couldn't marry them unless he could guess their names. Manawee guessed and guessed. The father shook his head and sent Manawee away time after time.

One day Manawee took his dog with him on a guessing visit. The dog saw that one sister was prettier and one sister was sweeter. They were twins and yet they were different. Manawee again failed to guess their names that day and trudged home with his little dog by his side. After they arrived, his little dog ran back to the hut of the young women and overheard them calling each other by name.

The dog ran fast to tell his master but got sidetracked, once by a large bone left by a lion and once by the smell of nutmeg in the air. The little dog absolutely loved nutmeg. On the third occassion the dog saw that the sisters were being readied for marriage and dressed as brides. Upon hearing them call each other by name he ran to tell his master. This time he was resolutely determind that nothing would stop him from delivering the precious names to Manawee.

The dog spied small fresh fish kill on the trail and at one point even though he smelled nutmeg in the air, he ignored both and ran towards home to tell his master the names of the two women. The little dog did not plan for a stranger to leap out of the bush, grab him by the neck and shake him so hard his tail almost fell off. The stranger shouted, "Tell me those names! What are the names of the young women so I may win them?" The dog thought he would faint, but he fought bravely. He growled, he scratched, he kicked, and finally bit the giant stranger between the fingers. The stranger bellowed like a water buffalo, but the little dog would not let go. The stranger ran off into the brush with the little dog dangling from his hand. The dog snarled and only released the man when he promised to let go of him and never come back again.

When the dog got back to Manawee his coat was bloodied and his jaw ached. However, his mind was clear and he told Manawee what was happening with the sisters and filled him in on their names.

Manawee raced back to the village with the dog riding high on his shoulders. When Manawee reached the father with the daughters names the twin sisters received Manawee, completely dressed to journey with him. They had been waiting for him all along.

The Twin Sisters in this story represent the dual nature of women, her 'without' and her 'within'. Manawee must use his own instinctual self 'the dog self' to accomplish the task of knowing the difference between these two natures.

The power of Two is in acting as one integral entity. A single stick is easily broken. Two or more sticks are stronger. We are stronger when we stand with another soul.

Women have tremendous powers when the individual and dual aspects are conciously recognized and beheld as a unit; held togerther rather than kept apart. Both sides of the duality must be fed.

Manawee has a taste for the wildish woman. Among the cumulative tribe of men in a woman's psyche whose memebers Jungians call Animus, there is also a Manawee like attitude, which finds and claims a woman's duality finding it valuable, courtable, and desirable, instead of devilsh, ugly, and to be distained. It is a fresh but faith-filled love whose central desire is to name and understand the mysterious and numous double in a woman's nature.

Masculine forces can carry Bluebeard-like, murderous Mr. Fox sorts of energy and therefore attempt to demolish the dual structure of women. That sort of suitor cannot tolerate duality and is looking for perfection, for one truth, the one immovable, unchangeable feminine substance embodied in one perfect woman. When you meet one of those. Run!

These characters are also a part of Dark Man dreams, just like the dark (possessing negative energy) stranger who jumps out of the bush, grabs the little dog and takes off with him. Stealing him away from what he loves, from his mission. It isn't until the little dog stands up to this negative force that he is free.

The little dog in the story shows exactly how psychic tenacity works. Dogs are the magicians of the universe. It is not by accident that men and women struggle to find the deeper sides of their natures and yet become distracted for any number of reasons, mostly pleasures of various sorts. Some become addicted to those pleasures and stay forever entangled there and never continue with their work.

If one overlooks a woman's dual nature and takes a woman at face value, one is in for a big surprise, for when the woman's wildish nature rises from her depths and begins to assert itself, she often has interests, feelings, and ideas which are quite different from those she expressed before.

If a woman wants a mate who is responsive she will reveal to him the secret of women's duality and have him ask her two questions that will make her feel seen, heard, and known.

The first question is this: "What do you want?"

The second question is this: "What does your deeper self desire?"

To love a man, the mate must also love her wildish nature. So men as much as women must name their dual natures. The wildish task of the man is to find her true names and not misuse that knowlege to seize power over her, but rather to apprehend and comprehend the numinous substance from which she is made, to let it wash over him, amaze him, shock him, even spook him. And to stay with it and sing out her names over her. It will make her eyes shine. It will make his eyes shine.

The good match is the man who keeps returning to try to understand, who does not let himself be deterred.


Excerpts from Chapter 4


"Women Who Run with the Wolves" by Clarissa Pinlola Estes, Ph.D


“At the end of the day, it’s not what you are, but who you are that matters. Be genuine, get real, be authentic, be in the moment.”   ~Linda Vettrus-Nichols

Evolution of a Healer – After leaving a ‘starter’ marriage of 33 years and finding the love of her life, Linda Vettrus-Nichols realized that the true ‘love of her life’ was herself. When Terry Earthwind Nichols first saw Linda he had no idea she was married or that she had just retained an attorney to process her divorce.

Ten months later he confessed how he felt when he had clamped his eyes on her…

Terry: “When I saw you I wanted to pick you up in my arms, tell you, ‘you’re mine and I’m marry you’. And I still feel that way!”

Linda: “You want to marry me? When do you want to marry me?”

He was delighted that she had said when.

Terry: “In a week-and-a-half two weeks, take your time.”

Linda: “You’re not kidding are you?”

Terry: “Nope”

Two-and-a-half weeks later they were hitched. No dating! Now that was weird and held more than many surprises, but they more than made it work. Here is a little something that Linda wrote four months later. Horrid? is one of Linda's musings after being told by a male friend that she was too loud and moved too fast...


Once upon a time, there was a little girl, who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead. And when she was good she was very, very good, but when she was bad she was horrid.

What is horrid? What does horrid mean? According to Webster’s New World Dictionary, horrid means very bad, ugly, and unpleasant. If one man’s treasure is another man’s trash or if one man’s dream is another man’s nightmare then horrid is a perception.

What is perception? If perception is how we view the world, then people’s perception will vary. What is true for me may not be true for you. As a child, I may have been naughty, but I was never a bad person. I certainly wasn’t the ugliest kid on the block. As for unpleasant, I could definitely be disagreeable, “my way or the highway.” Frustrating may be a better word to describe me than horrid. Annoying could most likely go in there too.

For some I talk too fast and/or too much. I’ve even been told I move too fast. Does that make me horrid? Does that make me a bad person? Does that make me ugly or unpleasant? Susan Sark in her book, Succulent Woman—Dancing with Your Wonderful Self! entitled one of her chapters, Fear of Being 'too much'. All her life she had heard that she was 'too much'. Too wild, too loud, too outrageous, too emotional, too sensitive, too needy, etc . She and her boyfriend had both been called “larger than life.” When she asked him if he felt “larger than life,” he put his hands on her shoulder and said, “Susan, this is the size life is, anyone who tries to make you smaller is just a Lilliputian.” She knew then she had found the right man for her.

I too have found the right man. A man who never puts me down or feels I’m too much. A man who loves me just the way I am. A man who bends over backwards for me unconditionally. A man who shares my hopes and dreams for a better future. A man who feels deeply and walks boldly with great humility. This man’s name is Terry Earthwind Nichols and he truly is “The Chosen One.”     ~Linda Vettrus-Nichols


Skeleton Woman and the Life/Death/Life Cycle

Skeleton Woman measures energy vs. distance. She knows what is required. She knows when it's time.

Death is always incubating new life...

What must I give more death to today, in order to generate more life?

What do I know should die, but am hesitant to allow to do so?

What must die in me in order for me to love?

What 'not-beauty' do I fear?

What use is the power of the 'not-beautiful' to me today?

What should die today?

What should live?

What life am I afraid to give birth to?

If not now, when?

"Women Who Run with the Wolves" by Clarissa Pinkola Estes Chapter 5, section: Untangling the Skeleton Woman pg.149 and 150 in my copy of the book (last two pages of that section)


"There is no death.

Death is very much like sunset.

It is only an appearance.

For, when the sun sets here, it rises elsewhere.

In reality the sun never sets.

Likewise, death is only an illusion, an appearance.

For what is death here is birth elsewhere.

For life is endless."

-Dada Vaswani

Brutal Loss in Fairy Tales

Why are there such brutal episodes in fairy tales? The brutal motif is an ancient way of causing the emotive self to pay attention to a very serious message.

From the fairy tale the Handless Maiden, the fact that both the Handless Maiden and the King suffered through the same seven-year-long initiation is the common ground between feminine and masculine--proving there can be profound love, especially if it is rooted in the seeking of one's own self.

Our psychic work is to wander into the forest again and again. When we come out we are still friendly, but beneath the skin, we are most definitely no longer tame. Deep intuition has set in. We have passed through another stage of psychic initiation. We have regained our noticing skills and are not easily fooled. We are clothed with psychic hairs that rise up and warn us of danger and keep us alert, no longer at the mercy of the Predator.

Finding oneself is not only a relief, it is a must for our survival. Really knowing who we are changes us and our environment...those around us are forced to change. It's like energetic dominos, when one domino changes position it touches another and changes its position. Having our own point of view allows others to check-in with their point of view.

Living fully present from your Soul is about noticing what is coming up for you as your body and mind begin to shift. The following truths have helped me to dance in my own flow. They are the spiritual truths that I teach my clients, to see what is really important to them and to be inspired by their own dance, getting them in touch with who they really are. I invite you to experience the gifts in all of them.

#1 Reclaim the REAL You. Your Soul knows who you are and why you are here. You are not here to heal, but to remember. We all come from the same source. We have forgotten who we are and why it is important to encourage one another. Together we complete each other and that which is to be remembered. This in turn creates clarity. By listening to your Soul you will know when you are DONE with a marriage, a job, a lifestyle or even an addiction.

#2 Stand in YOUR Truth. There is great emotional freedom in living and standing in your truth. “I think” -  “I can’t” -  “I don’t know”  are all lies. Stop lying and start living out your own civic engagement. Make a difference. We’re not born to be alone. We are born to be seen and understood; to love ourselves so we can love others in our community. At the end of the day, it’s not what you are, but who you are. Be genuine, be real, be authentic, and be in the moment. Feed your own Soul and you will be successful in your own eyes as well as in the eyes of others.

#3 Open YOUR Receiving Channels. When we are stressed we tend to push out, interrupt, and start thinking of what we will say next. Taking a breath helps us to receive what the other person is saying. Self-care is another way to open our receiving channels. When we don’t feel well supported it’s because we are not taking care of ourselves and not delegating to others.

#4 Pay Attention to YOUR Creative Patterns. When are they? What do you do that gets your creative juices flowing? What is your tempo? What costume are you wearing today? Is it the one that serves you, allows you to feel and be yourself as you tune into your own vibrations? I help my clients create, understand, and re-pattern their inner peace by starting with myself.

#5 Know YOUR Vision. Dreams that come true have plans, plans are supported by goals. Setting a goal is about setting an intention. Taking consistent action and attaining small goals builds confidence. Lack of self-worth and self-confidence results in ‘lack mentality’. If you are coming from a place of lack, you are actually lowering the vibration of the planet. You will never know your vision until you reach out and help others. They will point out your gifts and what you did to really help them. What energy moves you forward, excites you to do and be more than you are today?

#6 Serve Yourself First. At the dinner table we are taught to serve our company first. When we put the needs of others first, we have less energy to help them. This way of life can also lead us into a ‘dis-ease’ state. There is a price to pay living from such a place.

On an airplane we are taught to put on our own oxygen mask first so we can safely help others. Why must we wait for our first airplane ride to learn this lesson?

#7 Know Your REAL Love. It’s not about finding the love of your life, it’s about finding you and loving you so the love of your life can appear. This will empower you to love your life no matter what. If you have a man who loves you unconditionally then you are doing the same for yourself. If you have a man who never puts you down and feels you are ‘just right’ or the ‘perfect fit’ then you are doing the same for yourself. Loving you, loving me.

We lose power when we are not walking at the level of our Soul. This is when our perception governs our reality.

My intention is to make sure that every woman remembers how to walk at the level of her Soul.


Here’s one of my favorite quotes...

“Become unapologetically your truest self. “     ~Wild Woman Sisterhood


Busting the Mystery of Peri-menopause and Menopause

Busting the Mystery of Peri-menopause and Menopause is about learning to love ourselves. My biggest take away from reading the book: Menopause Mavens–Master the Mystery of Menopause is that my worth is not attached to my circumstances.

Other teachings I got from the book:

Menopause is…

A deep dive into a woman’s heart spirit and true nature.

A time for pure love!

A time to release what no longer serves me.

A time to open up to a new phase.

A time for richer and deeper experiences with more wisdom and inner truth.

A time to really tap into my deepest knowing.

Menopause is a unique opportunity to open up to our heart in a deeper way. Allowing our wings to open and spread more fully. It is a portal for our transformation. A time to get in touch with the Wild Butterfly Woman inside us all.

The Mindset of Menopause: What is, is!

Wake up to self

Walk toward love and away from fear

Menopause isn’t about hot flashes, it’s about Newsflashes realizing…

…what I really want.

…what I truly love.

…what or who is squashing my spirit.

Peri-menopause isn’t the beginning of the end. It’s about…

…connection and support.

…the transformation to tap into our deeper knowing.

Menopause isn’t about what I have lost. It’s about…

…what I have gained.

…creating my new life from the inside out.

…the foundation of who I am, allowing the barometer of my body to reflect what is in my heart.

These are my take aways from reading Menopause Mavens–Master the Mystery of Menopause. It is a great honor to be surrounded and supported by the teachings of my sister-authors in this book. I never had a sister and now I have many. Thank you dear sisters for your profound selves and sharing your experiences of transformation in a most raw and wonderful way.

        All proceeds from the purchase of               this book go towards resolving the             issue of domestic violence.  It's an honor to be one of the co-authors of this amazing, helpful, and thought provoking book.

        All proceeds from the purchase of               this book go towards resolving the             issue of domestic violence.

It's an honor to be one of the co-authors of this amazing, helpful, and thought provoking book.

What Kind of Man Are You Looking For?

Perhaps you have seen this before, floating around the definitely gets one thinking.

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing this question, "What kind of a man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?"

Reluctantly he said, "Yes." She began to expound, "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man: What can you do for me that I can't do for myself? I pay my own bills, I take care of my houshold without the help of any man or woman for that matter. I am in a postition to ask: What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a man who is striving for excellence in every aspect of life."

According to David Deida, author of the book

"The Way of the Superior Man--A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire",

a man who knows his mission

is the man this woman knows she is worthy of having in her life.

That way they will both have their shit together

and can stay fully present with themeselves and each other.

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms and asked her to explain. She said, "I need someone who is striving for excellence spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked. That is a recipe for disaster."

"I need a man who is striving for excellence financially because I don't need a financial burden. I need someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded." 

"I need someone who has integrity in dealing with relationships. Lies and game-playing are not my idea of a strong man." 

"I need a man who is family-oriented. One who can be the leader, priest, and provider to the lives entrusted to him."

"I need someone whom I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive, he just has to be worthy. And by the way, I am not looking for him. He will find me. He will recognize himself in me. He may not be able to explain the connection, but he will always be drawn to me as his help-mate. I can't help a man if he can't help himself."

When she finished she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, "You are asking a lot." She replied, "I'm worth a lot." 

This is for every woman. You are worth a lot! 

This is also for every man who has the maturity to understand!

The Handless Maiden--Initiation #7 The Wild Bride and Bridegroom

Soon after the young queen fled, the king returned from war. His old mother cried out to him saying, "Why would you have me kill two innocents?" and she showed him the eyes and tongue. The king staggered and wept. Upon seeing his true grief, his mother told him those were the eyes and tongue of a deer and that she had sent the queen and their perfectly healthy baby off into the forest.

The king refused to eat and vowed to find them. He searched for 7 years. Although the entire time he did not eat or drink, a force greater than he kept him alive.

Upon arriving at the inn, kept by the woods people, the woman in white beckoned him to enter. He was so tired and as he laid down to sleep the woman placed a veil over his face. The symbol of veiling is about preserving the wild nature without giving it all away to whomever asks. Like veiling a bowl of bread dough, placing a white cloth over it causes the bread to rise. The veil preserves and ferments the wild self. In feminine psychology, the veil is a symbol for a women's ability to take on whatever presence or essence they wish. 

The king's breath eventually blew the veil cloth off his face and when he woke he saw a lovely woman and a beautiful child gazing down at him. "I am your wife and this is your child." the young queen said. The king was willing to believe but saw that the woman had hands. "Through my travails and yet my good care, my hands have grown back." said his queen.

The woman in white brought the silver hands from a trunk where they had been treasured. The king rose and embraced his queen and his child. There was great joy in the forest that day.

The king and queen returned to the castle and the old mother with their seven-year-old-child. They held a second wedding and had many more children.

Thus, ends the 7 stages of initiation of the female psyche! A rebirth back to self so remember...

The Handless Maiden--Initiation #6 The Realm of the Wild Woman

That night near dark the same spirit in white, who had helped the maiden before, appeared and guided her to an inn run by kindly woods people. Another maiden in a white gown took the queen inside and knew her by name. The baby was laid down.

"How do you know I am a queen?" asked the young queen.

"We who are of the forest follow these matters, my queen. Rest now."

The queen stayed safe and sound for 7 years. Her hands grew back, first as little pink baby hands and then as little girl hands, and finally as women's hands.

As we practice the deep instinctive knowing about all manner of things we are learning over a lifetime. As we do our hands return to us, the hands of our womanhood.

When the young queen goes to the well and bends over to draw water, her baby falls into the well. She begins to shriek, and a spirit appears and asks why she does not rescue her child. "Because I have no hands!" she cries. "Do your best," says the spirit, and as the maiden puts her arms in the water, reaching toward her child, her hands regenerate then and there, and the child is saved.

This is a metaphor for the idea of saving the child-self from being lost again in the unconscious. It is our opportunity to grow the traumatized child. This keeps us from forgetting our soul-self--who we are and what our work is. It is at this point in our lives that even very charming people, very enchanting ideas, very alluring calliope music can be turned away with ease, and especially if it does not nurture a woman's union with the wild.

The regeneration of a woman's grasp on her life and work sometimes causes a momentary hiatus in the work, for she may not be totally confident of her newfound strengths. She may have to try them out for a time to realize how great their reach really is.

Even though the young queen was separated from her husband she was experiencing enrichment and restoration. There is always a helper who will lead us to shelter. The forest is sacred initiatory ground--it is here the Handless Maiden finds peace. This is the place where her fiery and flowering Soul regains its roots.  The female spirit who is the inn keeper, in the underworld, already knows the young queen. These two women who over seven years (7 being a holy number) come to know one another. The human and the spirit become one. This is called embodiment. 

The number 7 also resembles the moon's cycles. There are 7 main stages of initiation in a woman's life. Even in marriage there is what is called the seven-year-itch. Stages of spiritual development do not necessarily correspond to a woman's chronological age.

When the king returns from war, he and his mother comprehend that the Devil has sabotaged their messages. 

The story continues in my blog post: The Handless Maiden--Initiation #7 The Wild Bride and Bridegroom


The Handless Maiden--Initiation #5 The Harrowing of the Soul

The King was delighted that she was not just a spirit and said he would care for her. Now the maiden is attracting a strong healthy Animus, unlike her father who suffered from a weak Animus. 

The King brought the maiden to his castle and made her a pair of silver hands, which fastened to her arms. And then he married her.

In time the King waged war in a far-off land. He asked his mother to care for his young queen for he loved her with all of his heart. He told his mother, "If she gives birth to a child, send me a message right away."

The young queen did give birth to a happy, healthy babe. The king's mother immediately sent a message to her son. On the way, the 'messenger' got tired and coming to a river felt sleepier and sleepier and finally fell sound asleep at the river's edge. The Devil crept out from behind a tree and 'switched' the message. Now the message read that the young queen had given birth to a child that was half dog.

The king was horrified, yet sent back a message saying to love his queen and care for her in this terrible time. The messenger ran back towards the castle with the message. However, as he approached the river, he began to fell heavier and heavier like he had just eaten a feast. And once again he fell sound asleep at the river's edge. AND once again, the devil switched the message. This time the message said, "Kill the queen and the baby." When the messenger delivered the message, the king's mother was shaken by his request. She sent another message to confirm. The messages flew back and forth, the Devil intercepting them each time. The final message said, "Keep the tongue and eyes of the queen to prove she has been killed."

The old mother could not bear to kill the sweet young queen and the babe, her grandchild. Instead she became rather savvy and sacrificed a doe, removing the tongue and eyes and hiding them for safe keeping until her son returned. Then she helped the young queen bind her infant to her breast and veiling her she said she must flee for her life. The women wept and kissed each other good-bye.

The realm of the Wild Woman is deep within the forest, deep in the underground forest.

This was the deepest, darkest forest the young queen had ever seen / experienced!

That night near dark the same spirit in white, who had helped the maiden before, appeared and guided her to an inn run by kindly woods people. Another maiden in a white gown took the queen inside and knew her by name. The baby was laid down.

The story continues in my blog post: The Handless Maiden--Initiation #6 The Realm of the Wild Woman

This was the deepest, darkest forest the young queen had ever seen / experienced!

This was the deepest, darkest forest the young queen had ever seen / experienced!

The Handless Maiden--Initiation #4 Finding Love In The Underworld

The maiden floated into the garden and supped on a pear. The magician came close enough to her to ask her a question. "Are you of this world or not of this world?" And the maiden answered, "I was once of this world, and yet I am not of this world." Like becoming born again. The rebirth born of the spirit. The awakening of the fact that we are humans embodied by our spirit, our holy spirit, our divine spirit, connected to all divinity. Bringing about the understanding that in the spirit world and in the seen world we are all connected.

If we died and were thrown into the woods our body would decay and turn into dust that would be absorbed by the trees and plants as nutrients and eaten by the worms and insects and as food for the birds, etc. We would even become the animals as they foraged through the woods eating the plants or other animals. 

Okay, back to the story: The King was delighted that she was not just a spirit and said he would care for her. Now the maiden is attracting a strong healthy Animus, unlike her father who suffered from a weak Animus. 

The King brought the maiden to his castle and made her a pair of silver hands, which fastened to her arms. And then he married her.

The story continues in my blog post: The Handless Maiden--Initiation #5 The Harrowing of the Soul

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